My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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