Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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