He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
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