Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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