yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
