Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
