you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
