I'm really into asian looking animals
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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