Duck Duck Cougar?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
i think im in europe. pls send help
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize