i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Randomize
