The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
You pole danced in your parka.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize