it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
