i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
