it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
