I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
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