just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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