at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
