Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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