its not stalking. its research.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
she told me i tasted like america
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Randomize