We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
false alarm. still invincible.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
