just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
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