So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
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