so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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