you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
