people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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