If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
