That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Randomize