the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
