elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
