...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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