New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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