I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Randomize
