New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Randomize
