I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize