I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize