How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
