New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize