She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
