before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
