it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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