Say something about gay babies.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Randomize
