And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
It's just like the Real World with babies
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
