i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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