I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
this hospital has no fireball
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize