you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
