THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
