like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
Randomize
