my mouth tastes like poor choices
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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