Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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