U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
