I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
the liver wants what the liver wants
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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