is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
